Friday, October 29, 2010

President-Elect Keaton Unveils His Cabinet: Welcome Team ASS-Backwards ! (Part I)

President-Elect Keaton, or Buster as he prefers to be called, has named one half of his cabinet. "I am proud to introduce the first members of Team ASS-Backwards (short for America's Simple Solutions-Backwards) to the nation. Together I know we can get America back on the  right track!"

Here are Buster's hand-picked selections:

Vice-President: Roscoe "Fatty" Arbuckle
Roscoe has always supported Buster in more ways than one. Buster has full confidence in Roscoe and states "Roscoe Arbuckle personifies the ASS-Backwards American!"

Secretary of State: Mary Pickford
Mary is a woman loved by the world. If anyone can make everyone behave, it's Mary!

Secretary of the Treasury: Douglas Fairbanks
Buster saw "Robin Hood" and concurs with its fiscal policy.

Secretary of Education: Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy
Here we get 2 for 1. The duo's experience in higher education makes them uniquely qualified to inspire American youth to greater heights.

Secretary of Transportation: Mabel Normand
Mabel knows how to get around in style.

Secretary of Energy: Ben Turpin
Ben is full of energy (real and manufactured)!

Secretary of Defense: Harry Houdini
Buster thinks Harry's unique skills might come in handy in a pinch.

Secretary of Veterans Affairs: Theda Bara
Buster figures that if any Vets want to have an affair, Theda is the woman for the job.

More Buster coming soon. Follow his first 100 days:
* Buster picks the rest of his cabinet
* Buster meets the media (and it ain't pretty)
* Buster and Brown Eyes move into the White House
* The First Lady as a fashion icon
* Buster deals with Congress
* Buster puts America back to work
* And More!

Buster reached across the aisle to Silent Society candidate Charlie Chaplin and offered him the position of Secretary of Labor.

At first, Mr. Chaplin was not in a conciliatory mood.
But Charlie is not a sore loser or the type to stay mad long. He considered the pros and cons of Buster's offer.

Pros: He has been a working man
and has long been a supporter of organized labor.

Cons: Charlie really hates to work
And so, Buster created a new position: Secretary of the Cinema. The Secretary of the Cinema will travel the nation and the globe promoting the universal language and love of all movies.

Mr. Chaplin eagerly accepted and can't wait to get started! In fact, many say this is the job he wanted all along.  Buster said, "I know I picked the right man for the job!"
The New Secretary of the Cinema: This is the job I was born for!


Will said...

that is awesome. I live in Chicago and I would vote for that administration twice! Thanks

Jan Miner said...

Very funny! I wondered if Charlie would get an offer!

FlickChick said...

Buster's motto is "vote early, vote often!" I know he could do a bang up job and I think we would all be highly entertained!

Sarah said...

Love it! I have that photo of Buster and Arbuckle. When I came across it, I had to save it as it's the only one I have seen where Buster is kinda smiling. Very rare! Love the post!

FlickChick said...

Thanks to all. Buster is still selecting the rest of the team. After that - watch out!

Anonymous said...

I sure hope Fatty's scandal doesn't surface. Vote Keaton!

Freder said...

Now that's what I call a dream team!

Anonymous said...

just found ur site and luv it!! that part with president keaton and his cabinet is hilarious!! way to go, great stuff!!

whistlingypsy said...

Working on Buster’s behalf, you have gathered a truly inspired collection of creative anarchists. My favorite appointments are Mabel Normand as Secretary of Transportation (the girl new how to handle an automobile) and Theda Bara as Secretary of Veteran Affairs: “if Vets want to have an affair”…actually I heard Buster had a difficult time deciding between Theda and Pola Negri (my first choice).